Friday, November 12, 2010

In His Hands

Tomorrow is Jeremy's birthday. 

Flashback:
January  2000 
 
Jeremy went on a skiing trip with his college group, Baptist Student Ministries. He was twenty years old. As he slammed out the door with  his friend, Zach, I turned to Judy and despaired, "I didn't even tell him bye!" Before he was down the road any ways, he'd returned, to give his mom a proper hug and good bye. Later, I'd wonder if God had granted me that final memory.

We were out of pocket, no cell phone, but when we got the news...we called the hospital to hear the Doctor explain, Jeremy hit his head on a tree, while skiing, and we should come to Denver. He'd had a seizure on the mountain,  been care flighted, and was in a  medically induced coma...no real prognosis, tests being run to see the extent of injury and whether surgery would be needed, as with most head injuries, time would tell.

Everyone was gathered at our home. Praying, packing, making arrangements, with no assurance  Jeremy would be alive, when we  arrived, thus our long journey began.  I vividly recall my pray of thanksgiving, in the midst of the unknown. Thank you God that you are not a God of fate, tossing us about, but a God that knows. A reassuring truth from God, when the world could offer none, keeping panic at bay during a stormy, over hour long trip to the airport.

During the plane ride, I continued to experience God's presence so strongly, flashing memories like old movies, of Jeremy's life...when he sat in the pastor's study and asked Jesus to be his Savior and explaining, to the preacher, that it meant King of his life...  Then, I pictured  strong hands cupped open, as if holding something fragile and precious, these words falling sweetly on my heart. "Lezlee, I know Jeremy is your son and you love him, but as much as you love him...I love him more! And no matter what happens to him...live or die, I have him right here in the palms of  my hands." I wanted to jump from the  seat and praise the Lord, but instead I turned and shared with William what had  happened. Then, I thanked God and begged God, all in the same breath, for loving my boy and assuring me no matter what, he was in His hands, while pleading... please God don't be preparing me for his death, but thank you God for getting us through anything...

That was the longest walk, to the emergency desk. Asking if, where our son was...

He stayed in the hospital a week, and had to take the semester off school, but has no lingering problems...other than an occasional ache in his shoulder...God loves us, regardless of what the earthly outcome might be, He is still God, no matter what!


I scribbled a journal, during my vigil, by Jeremy's bedside, that week. This was the last entry.




Blessed be the Lord, 
for He has heard the sounds of my pleadings.
The Lord is my strength and my shield, 
in Him my heart trusts,
so I am helped,
and my heart exalts, 
and with my song I give thanks to Him!

Psalms 28: 6-7




I was concerned about writing this post, knowing some of life's stories have endings I don't understand...endings that try to shatter our faith, but just as God showed me on that plane, He still loves us today, with an unimaginable love and desires to hold us in the palms of His hands...


In His Hands,
Lezlee



22 comments:

The Primitique said...

Lezlee, no words. But, I'll repeat yours. "In His hands." ~Mindy

trash talk said...

Lezlee,
This is one of the most powerful posts I've ever read. During the time before and after Bella's birth I experienced every emotion you just described beautifully. God spoke to us through your words to what He wants us all to know. He has a perfect plan for all us...we just have to believe. Thank you and Praise God.
Debbie

junkermidge said...

Awesome post, Lezlee. So glad God's desire was for you to have your son with you still -- and with no ill effects from the accident. Thank you for sharing your faith and trust in the Lord, no matter life's outcomes.
Midge

glenda said...

Whew, what a harrowing time for you, Lezlee.
I'm praising God, too, for bringing your son thru..What a testimony of God's grace.
thank you for sharing, things like this build up our faith.
glenda

Tete said...

I am so glad that God calmed you in your storm and that he allowed you to keep Jeremy here with you. It could have been a test for you and your faith- and you accepted and trusted his decision- passing with flying colors.
Our faith will be tried by fire- heart ache- it's not what we go through that's important, but rather how we go through it.
Hopefully- with both hands in His.
Jeremy was in His hands- but so were you...and still are- for He is God, even when we don't think we need him so much.
Never be afraid to share God on your blog and the wonder gifts He gives. It lifts His name and gives hope to others. We will all leave this post thinking, praying and thanking Him.
Hugs- Tete

Oregon Gifts of Comfort and Joy said...

Lezlee,

Thank you so much for sharing this. The Lord heard your prayers and I am so happy for your family that he answered them in the way He did. I am so happy that your boy is fine!

Kathy

Corn in my Coffee-Pot said...

Wow!
Lezlee-- what a powerful testimony!
I have just gotten around to reading everyone's blogs and catching up... I left yours for last cause I wanted to really dig in and see what you've been up to. ;)
I cried when I read this post--- great, great testimony, God is Sovereign!

Thanks for sharing it.

Blessedmom's Simple Home said...

What a beautiful and inspiring post. Thank you for sharing how God comforted you during that flight, and happy birthday to Jeremy!
Blessings,
Marcia

* French Farmhouse 425 * said...

~*~Wow~*~*~ I am in tears and just so thankful that you shared what God put on your heart~*~* I am so happy that your son is alive and doing well~*~* HUGS, Rachel :)

Granny J said...

Thank you for sharing this story. I"m glad you had your faith to support you in the time of need. So many people don't have that strong faith. Give Jeremy an extra birthday hug from me. Granny J

Midwestern Gone Idahoan said...

Thank you so much for sharing! Yes, sometimes the endings aren't what we want - but I know God is there and helping us through it all!

I am glad your son was okay!

Kathy said...

An amazing, emotional, beautiful story. It brought tears to my eyes. I was having a pity party because I have a cold. You certainly put THAT into perspective. I won't complain again. This is a phenomenal story. Loved it.
Cheers - Kathy

Terry @ La Bella Vie said...

Lezlee,
I came over to say congrats when I came upon this story. I must say I was sitting here reading in tears hoping our loving God really had a different plan and therefore was only testing your strength in your faith. Apparently he did and how thankful you must be my friend!
Congrats on winning the Home Goods give away, how fun was that! I was so shocked but thrilled! Thank you again!
Terry

Kolein said...

Thank you Lezlee.

Crying.

This is beautiful!

xo
~Kolein

artteachergirl said...

What a touching post, Lezlee. Praise and rejoicing for Jeremy's life, your family's faith and spiritual outlook. That had to have been the longest plane ride and the most difficult of times for all of you! God is good always! Hug Jeremy for me:-)

Discarded Forlorn said...

Wow, what a testament to God's faith! Thanks for sharing this. Hope tomorrow is a great celebration!

judi said...

awesome & powerful testimony...thanks for sharing.
we still need those stories that have happy endings & know that only God is responsible for it.
happy birthday jeremy!

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

Oh Lezlee, what a heart-felt, beautiful testimony! My heart was racing to the hospital with you. I'm so glad that you had God in your life to hold you up during this, and I'm so glad you shared your love of God in this post. What a moving testimony of your faith. Happy Birthday to Jeremy! Praise God! laurie

Donna said...

Oh my gosh! I can not imagine going thru what you did! I am so glad that you have your faith to pull you thru times like this. And I am so glad that you have your beloved Jeremy with you!! Hope he has a great birthday:)

Creative Ambitions said...

Lezlee... Praise God!! So sorry you all had to go through that... but it looks like you stayed faithful and trusted God! I am so glad you recieved His comfort and blessing through such a tough time... such a great post and testimony!!

nancy said...

I remember this like it was yesterday.

A Tale of Two Cities said...

What a beautiful testimony of God's faithfulness to us at all times. Every Thanksgiving must be an extra special day for you.

Have a wonderful holiday,
Debi